Holy mother of pearl I had the two most fucked up days at work this past weekend.  I was all geeked out and ready to write on Friday afternoon but figured since I wrote in the middle of the night before it’d have wasted that post so I decided to wait until today.  Then NYE happened.  What a mess THAT was.

Let’s start with Friday.  I went in at 11:30 and was asked how I felt about going behind the bar since the bartender was sick. I’m a cocktail waitress.  I’m very comfortable with alcohol and I won’t ever turn my boss down for anything so I got a ten minute crash course in bar tending and then was super excited to do it because I felt like Tom Cruise in “Cocktail” and it was a Friday afternoon so I didn’t expect to be that busy right?

WRONG.

The place was mobbed.  The dining side had a party of 22 come in who ALL drank which never happens on a lunch shift and it’s the bartender’s job to fill those orders but the printer wouldn’t print out what they were and I had a substantial amount of people sitting at the bar so I didn’t have the time to fill every order.  The girls themselves were walking back behind the bar grabbing beers and mixing drinks and we were all Googling how to make certain blended ones we weren’t sure of.  I made a White Russian.   Yay.

One gal took the bar dining side, I had the bar and the other two girls worked the crowded lunch floor by herself.  Even with the bartender on staff it would have been a little hectic but I loved every second of it.  I made decent money and the day flew by.  I’d happily be a daytime bartender from now on but I’ve decided to become a certified trainer so I think I’ll just stick with one upgrade at a time.

Then comes New Year’s Eve.  What a disaster that was.  I went in with the mindset that I’d pull in $300.  Nope.  $84 big ones.  I had a full section, it was just full of people who clearly never go out and obviously don’t know how to party because they had about two beers and left $3 tips.  We were cleared out by 1 and I had a MASSIVE fat super gay guy scream at me then to my boss about me because he was REALLY drunk.

His friend cashed out their check at 12:20 and at 1:10 the big guy ordered another drink so I brought that with the new check with him.  I said it’s NYE and we have to have a credit card on file but since he’d been there already I can have him close it out now or keep it open if he wants to keep drinking.  His friend came in and I said the same thing again.  The big guy didn’t seem to understand that we had already closed the tab out.  His friend did.  He said please close it again, he’s done drinking so that’s what I did.  Holy hell you should have seen the receipt.  I’d have taken a picture of it if the handwriting was readable and it didn’t have my work name on it.  He wrote how terrible I was as a server and how I will destroy that company if I don’t get fired then he yelled at my boss about me for a solid 20 minutes and I almost cried because I was already on the verge of tears having had no one to kiss at midnight that I just decided to be in a shit mood for the rest of the night.

After the big guy left we all followed my boss into the back to explain what we saw him to to me and my boss actually paused to wash his face with soap because he said that guy spit all over him.  Ew.  He knew I wasn’t at fault, admitted the guy was just hammered and only teased me about it for the rest of the night but that guy killed my New Year’s Eve party.  None of us made money because all you broke-ass people stayed at home and I didn’t get my real New Year’s celebration until I happily found a pair of Pillow Pet slippers that fit me at Walmart at 5am.

So that was my work weekend in a nutshell.  How was yours?

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