Holla.

So I haven’t really checked in with you other than to make fun of people and tell you about my future endeavors.   That there above is the Chop Shop.  It seems I’m going there on Wednesdays now.  For those of you who don’t follow me on Twitter or Facebook, it turns out a friend of mine knows someone who takes people naked skydiving.  Holds four world records for it.

I will accomplish the tasks set forth on my “Fuck it list” and I plan on making the dive next spring.

My life is busy.  Very busy.  I wake up, go to work (either serving or blogging), hang with the kids until bedtime, come home, shower then go to my meetings and hang out with the group after.  The after part is just as therapeutic as the meetings themselves.  I fucking love those people.  I have two ladies I’m getting close with and a few guys I’m crazy about.  One of them is very special in every sense of the word and I know he’s reading this so HEY THERE BUDDY!

We all hang out at a 24 hour cafe/bakery playing Spades nearly every night.  I lose.  Everyone loses to the top guns.  I’m the only one who never seems bothered by this.  They have the same routine and I have it all figured out.  They’ve mind-melded themselves into one super being and will not be defeated.  I don’t mind losing.  The best part is watching them mentally destroy their opponent, namely my partner.  I try over and over to tell them they need fight the force but they can not for their frustration and dismay pours out and is sucked up by those crazy fuckers.

I don’t use names without permish and I’m having a hard time deciding what to call them but my young suitor (what he shall be referred to for now) is the funniest son of a bitch out there.  He won’t stop.  He fires out joke after joke (sometimes using a British accent) and I have NO IDEA how he remembers all of them but they’re delightfully offensive and often times corny but they just don’t stop.  I suck at jokes but I’ll try to remember a one to give you an idea of what I’m working with -

Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

9-11

9-11 who?

I thought you said you’d never forget.

He waited until yesterday to say it, so at least he showed some respect.  I love him.  Okay, another one…um…

Well there are a lot of dead baby and religious jokes.  Those are always amusing because I like watching people squirm.  The group as a whole likes to belt out those jokes as well as offensive pornographically explicit and racially offensive jokes which are okay since they’re being said to the people who should be offended but typically aren’t.  Make sense?

Another fine individual was telling me a story about how he and his ex-girlfriend had one of those Pure Romance things going on where they sold toys and lubes and such and one day went to do anal and just a short while after they started she was screaming out in pain.  The next morning she was still hurting and went so far as to assume she might have gotten hemorrhoids but it turned out she was just irritated because they accidentally used clitoral stimulator instead of anal lube.  Yeah.  You’re going to want to know the difference between those two.  The best place to find out more is at Edenfantasys.com.  I have a giveaway going on with them this month and you can get to it by clicking in my right sidebar and just follow the instructions.  It’s pretty damn popular.  If you want to learn about different types of toys and the proper lubrication to use so you don’t end up screaming in agony, Edenfantasys.com is the way to go.

Other than sitting around my meetings finding strength and clarity in my new found sobriety, I’m finding I’m making friends I can trust.  We’re all in the same boat – we don’t want to drink anymore.  We trust each other.  I need to be surrounded by people I can trust to not hurt or betray me and it seems I might be running low in that area so I’m fortunate that I’m able to clean up my life, better my health and form new relationships with people who will help guide me through this new chapter in my life.

It’s also awesome that everyone at these damn meetings are hot as hell.  Just sayin’.  Hanging out with attractive people in a comfortable setting followed by laughter, pastries from a 24 hour cafe and playing Spades isn’t exactly the worst way to spend my evenings.  I’m doing great at work (except today sucked), spending a TON of time with my kids and I’m really finding that I can be happy and sober in my life and I do have great people supporting me making it all the more easier.

It’s 3 in the damn morning and I have to take Jake to therapy at 11:30 so I’m going to wrap this up.  I honestly have no idea where I was going with it anyway.  Enjoy!

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