Random Tuesday Thoughts – I Hate Yams
Go Random. Go To The Un Mom. Right Now. Well, Read This First.
I was going to say something stupid and Popeye-ish but I hate Popeye. I am who I am. Hence the “Yam” reference in the title.
I’ve been really struggling the past few weeks because I’ve been getting A LOT of media attention I may or may not deserve and I’ve actually been directing a lot of it over to The Wii Mommies, my other fantastic health/fitness site that I founded with some beautiful hotties but in doing do, I’m killing my own numbers.
Most of these media outlets list both anyway and I love it but I write (and talk – constantly) like a person who’d be born if a trucker and a sailor mated and tossed me out of them.
Wait about one day and you’ll see a very offensive comment left by my father that I will find hilarious and would have wanted to write myself but because of integrity I’m supposed to possess, am going to let his mind take that tasty nugget and do with it what he pleases.
So any who, I know there are A LOT of people coming to this site. A lot of what I’m going to assume are rather conservative people. People who are not like my typical readers who enjoy the hysterectomy/lack of pooping trash posts I write.
This isn’t random enough hold on.
I went into Target and had one of the most enjoyable moments of my life. Head held high, shoulders back, I proudly approached a Target employee and said “I need to get my 22 month old a leash, do I go to the kids section or the pets area?”
Hells yes, people. You try flying with him. Seriously. I can’t.
No one has really told me I need to tone it down, but I know me. I get a little wild. I am freaking HILARIOUS. I never read (or proofread) what I write. Eventually, a few months down I’ll need to find a post and instead of searching within my site because my search function sucks (comment me a WP Plugin that doesn’t suck), I just Google my post and find it. Sometimes I’ll see another one listed and I don’t remember writing it because I rarely pay attention to what I type and I’ll take a gander and not only laugh hysterically, but I feel like I’m reading something someone really freakin funny wrote.
Not reading my work, watching my TV appearances or reading print about me a policy I’ve stuck to for the 16 years I’ve been published. I find too many errors with either what was said (like I couldn’t convey my statement properly), or I hate the way I look.
I don’t think it’s fair that men can have an all in one shampoo and body wash. I want women to have a shampoo/conditioner/body wash that can also give me bubbles to shave my legs. If it would dry me off and style my hair, I’d appreciate that as well.
Notice I haven’t dropped a single F Bomb? What do I do? Who am I? I’m clearly capable of writing well without being crude but I ENJOY being crude. If I tone it down, the cash flow’ll rise, so there’s motivation, but I feel like I’ll be cheating myself – not you – because you could give a shit (whoops, poopy) because you love me, remain faithful and laugh at what I say. Casey may have issue with this, she likes F-Bombs.
My four year old was talking so much the other day, Captain Creativity wisely said, “You’re about to take a long trip to your Grandmothers for the entire month. You’d better conserve your voice so you can talk to everyone there without losing it”. WITHOUT QUESTION, THAT WAS THE MOST BRILLIANT STATEMENT EVER SPOKEN. He whispered for a solid hour.
What do you think I should do? Should I risk losing potential readers who wouldn’t like my unique “Momspective”, therefore losing possible revenue or do I go back to my vulgarity I have the most fun with? I know you guys and what you’ll say, but just imagine if it was you.
I’m sitting naked at a desk in Miami writing this as fast as I can so I can get some kind of color at the pool before I party my ass off (professionally, of course, I’m media) at Madden Bowl, the HARDEST event to get into. Gimme an “Oh snap” and slap me on the ass.
I guess I’m not completely gone…
Did I mention I’m hilarious?
Look for a potential, more detailed bitch fest about this Thursday. I’m not trying to be a tool but I trust all of you, I’m wicked tired and I need content because all the content I have planned I’m slapping into next week after I finish my vacation here.
Click on the button on the top. Go see Keely. I don’t have the strength to hyper-link today but that image is and she is worth every penny you won’t have to spend to read her, because reading blogs is free. She started this. Don’t blame me.
24 Comments »
RSS feed for comments on this post | TrackBack URL | Create your avatar
The last thing the internet needs is another mommy blogger blowing sunshine up everyone’s ass. Go ahead and be crude, most of us want to be but we’re too ‘well behaved’ to do it.
Mama Geek´s last blog ..Mortage and Interest and Refunds, Oh My!
I’m following you. I like the rambling and funny stuff. It would be nice to be loose and fun like you. You may like this rock vowel song. My kids watched it. What’s one cuss word in a kid’s song? I’d post it, but I guess I’m just too uptight. Keep up your writing and have fun!http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_09tHIeiBnI
Michelle Breum´s last blog ..Magnetic Letter Work
Michelle Breum Reply:
February 2nd, 2010 at 1:42 pm
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_09tHIeiBnI
I didn’t leave a space to make this site be a link. Sorry
Michelle Breum´s last blog ..Magnetic Letter Work
“…after I finish my vacation here.”:)
kyooty´s last blog ..Random Tuesday Thoughts, Ice time?
This is a hard one, no matter what, vulgarity or not, your friggin hilariASS!! Do whats important to you, what’ll make you the happiest because if not it’ll show up in your writing.
TheChickenista´s last blog ..Je t’aime Mon Cheri
I wouldn’t go anywhere even if you toned it down Julie, you won’t get rid if me that easily.
Most people would probably say, “don’t change a thing” or “do whatever makes you happy”, and they are right. But if it were me in your position and I was guaranteed a fixed amount of revenue and the only thing I’d have to do was lose the F-Bombs, I’d do it for the money… LOL. And besides, whose definition of “tone it down” are we talking about here anyway?
Ane´s last blog ..Random Tuesday Thoughts: Words*
oh and I love yams cause they’re sweet and gives you gas…
but I don’t like Popeye cause what kind of a person has a name like Popeye anyway??!
Ane´s last blog ..Random Tuesday Thoughts: Words*
I guess it depends on WHY you’re blogging. If you’re blogging for bucks, then it makes more sense to appeal to a wider audience. If you’re blogging for YOU, then you should absolutely say whatever the fuck you want.
Also, why are you naked?
Rachel´s last blog ..Say What?
I think you need to be true to yourself. Fuck those who don’t see your humor and style. I found that out long ago. When I first started blogging I tried to be cutesy and not swear or say bad things. My blog sucked and I could barely think of anything to say. I’m sure people could tell that I wasn’t being real. Then I let loose. Now I blog how I really think and it is soooo much easier!! I love it!
Mee2´s last blog ..Dear Drivers,
Julie Reply:
February 2nd, 2010 at 6:54 pm
I’m making out with you virtually now.
I’m bitching, but I’m funny. Well, I think I’m funny. http://www.momspective.com/friggin-yams/...
cherylfenton Reply:
February 2nd, 2010 at 4:09 pm
@Momspective funny bitches are the best kind!
I get that you don’t want to scare off other readers. I do that in my posts and it sucks. I am too conservative and not enough, swear lovin’, potty talk, poop sharing me. I slowly trying to throw that part of me in the mix but its hard to see people not really enthused by what I say. I love you though!
Kimberly@PrettyPinkMomma´s last blog ..True Story Tuesday – Fart Bump
Julie Reply:
February 2nd, 2010 at 6:54 pm
…she writes as her last post pops up titled “Fart Bump”…
Julie’s Daddy’s Random Thoughts:
– We all have our demons, and mine make the best green bean casserole.
– In a world of constant surveillance, I bet everyone will really hate my hair.
– If you gaze long enough into the deep, dark abyss, they’ll eventually kick you out of the Hallmark store.
– If you’re a centipede, you can never have too many pairs of khakis.
– Living inside a snow globe would be fun for about 3 minutes. After that, you’d probably get bored and drown.
– It’s a shame, actually, because dynamite is really high in fiber.
– Low Fat Pringles bragging “a 3rd less fat” is like a serial killer saying: “I’m innocent because I’m a 3rd less murdery.”
– And now for the offensive comment Julie warned you I’d post: The Rock’s in a movie where he plays the Tooth Fairy. It’s aimed at parents who are really bad at thinking of shit to do with their kids.
Dr. B.´s last blog ..PRESIDENT OBAMA GOES TO THE LIONS’ DEN – - – AND MAULS THE LIONS! 104 AGAINST 1 WAS NOT A FAIR FIGHT… FOR THE 104!
I said I was trying, lol! This is the first post I have written about farts!
Kimberly@PrettyPinkMomma´s last blog ..True Story Tuesday – Fart Bump
I like the way you become spontaneous as you near the end of your post. The liberal thought you include in the article and the fun way of doing it is what makes me visit this site often.
Seek No More
Kirhat´s last blog ..The Convenience of SWUP
You need to make a living. Maybe toning down the F-bomb woudl work, but would you be you then? I love reading your blogs just the way they are. Do what is in your heart. I love your potty talk!!!
Hah! I love what Mama Geek said. Be true to yourself. Unless the money is really good. lol
frogmama´s last blog ..Random Tuesday Thoughts: What happened to all the flashers?
Oh snap…*slap*!
I HAFTA remember that whispering trick! That’s brilliant.
Have fun.
You’re getting media attention in spite of the F-bombs, so just keep doing what you do best… Be you!
I fuckin’ love ya, so you couldn’t sway me either way. (snicker!)
Stacy (the Random Cool Chick)´s last blog ..Random Tuesday Thoughts – Groundhog Day, LOST Returns, Dinosaurs Delivered, Full Moon Lantern and Mud Doggie Boots
It’s a fine line, isn’t it? You want to be yourself, because that’s what endears your readers. Are you leaving money on the table? Perhaps. But your openness is what I personally find entertaining.
Go spend some time at ittybiz.com, you’ll see a very successful woman that can swear with the best of ‘em.
I say let the F-bombs fly. If readers stay, they are meant to be. If they run away like little girls, do you really want them here? Those are the peeps that you direct over to the “less vulgar” Wii Mommies.
Todd´s last blog ..10 reasons why you need a Personal Trainer
Wait, this is your very own personal blog, right? Then why the hell do people care if you write like you talk? That’s what it’s all about. I like to read blogs that made me feel like I’m talking to a friend. So I say, fuck that shit! HA!
Amanda @ Mad Mom´s last blog ..Soft Scrub Total Bath & Bowl Review
If you need the money leave it as it is but I would suggest soemwhere in the middle. I am somewhat conservative but I can appreciate an honest post as long the crude language doesn’t make it loose the value in the post. I worked at a factory and some of the people sounded like ignorant fools using the F word to describe everything including and “and” “the”. If you were to type a paragraph they spoke and remove the foul language you might have a sentence. That was very annoying to me.
Carrie´s last blog ..Celia’s Puppies by Claudia Hall Christian