Bitchfest ’09 – Part Deux
I was planning on writing about fantasy football today, because I initially dedicated my Mondays to my Fantasy Football training stuff, but I am absolutely MISERABLE today and I’ve decided to bitch instead. I’ve already written my Bitchfest ’09 this year, but I’m bringing y’all a round two, simply because I’m bitching and it’s still 2009. Aren’t I a bundle of joy?
I love Thanksgiving. I freaking LOVE it. All year long, I look forward to the joys of stuffing my face without guilt. I talk about it for weeks in advance. I prep for it by finding my favorite stretchy pants and giggle in anticipation.
This Thanksgiving, I got the Swine Flu or some shit.
I doubt that’s what it was, but what the frick. Regardless, I was sick. Super sick.
Beyond that, I’m bipolar. I tell everyone all the time so y’all probably know that. I’m also menopausal, which I never thought would bother me, since I hated my uterus for making me so uncomfortable with the grudge it had against me, but I was wrong. It bothers me.
No 32 year old bipolar woman who suffers from depression and anxiety should be menopausal. THAT right there is a fact. Every time I go to a doctor and have to give my history (which is a lot lately because the menopause is making me OLD), I get a super sympathetic look and am told that that is WAY too much for someone my age to go through.
Why the hell do they call it the Swine Flu anyway? My husband is convinced that’s what I have since I have all the symptoms, but saying it makes me feel fat and H1N1 sounds too ominous so I’m just going with the Flu. I’ve Lysol’d everything in my house, including myself. Yes, I sprayed myself with Lysol. Then I swam in hand sanitizer.
I just looked it up on the CDC page and now they’re making like Prince and saying “the disease formerly known as The Swine Flu”. Lame.
My only joy right now is my new video game, Resident Evil. I totally just wrote a kick ass review of it on my review blog and my husband is saying I should invest in as many violent zombie-killing games as possible until all of this crazy sorts itself out. I’m Googling some now.
Since I’ve been sick for six days, I’ve been throwing up my handful of medications I’m supposed to take daily for the menopause and crazy. I was so out of it, I forgot to take it one day and my doc said missing my estrogen for one day will trigger menopausal symptoms so I’m having hot flashes and bitching in random spurts, much like I am right now.
My husband just threatened to take me to the doctor if I don’t call them, so I just did. They’re going to call me back. I told them I have the artist formerly known as the Swine Flu and they said “We’ll just jot this down and have the nurse call you right back.”
I think I scare people when the crazy comes out. I do have someone at my home taking care of my house and children, so I’ve basically just locked myself in our theater room where I’ve been sleeping and killing Zombie’s to avoid getting anyone else in my house sick. Nobody likes me very much. Well YOU do, but you’re not in my house right now sitting in a haze of Lysol watching Spongebob.
I’m starting to feel better, since I took a break from writing this to work out but I expect a full-on blast of misery to head my way in about ten minutes, so I’m going to grab a quick bite of something I’ll vomit up an hour later and take myself a nap.
Please feel very sorry for me and tell me all about it in my comment section below.
26 Comments
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I do feel sorry for you, one, because I have a deathly fear of vomiting. But wow. Yeah. You kill those damn Zombies. And whatever else you need to do. And whatever else I can do, beyond egging you on to write a ‘bitching’ post, you just let me know. Mm ‘kay?
Totally dig your sparkly skull and cross bones. That rocks.
Now going to subscribe to your blog because I love you.
.-= Gina´s last blog ..Masunaga in the House! =-.
Julie Reply:
November 30th, 2009 at 6:59 pm
YOU are a super saucy, lovely awesome woman. I love Twitter for helping me find you
I love you honey!! Feel better! You put up with way to much crap to have to deal with this bullsh&t!!!
.-= Theresa´s last blog ..Sea Life Aquarium =-.
OMFG! You are hilarious! I so love this blog!
I feel for you. Being sick seriously sucks! My whole family has had the swine flu (myself included), so I feel your pain. I also have a huge fear of vomiting, so that part extra sucks.
Do whatever you need to do, to make yourself feel better. Kill zombies, bitch, moan, whatever it takes!
Feel better.
.-= Wendy´s last blog ..IMShopping is starting the next wave of hiring! =-.
Feel better soon Julie… and bitch to your lil heart’s content… we all need a good bitchfest every now and then.
A Lil Enchanted,
~LaShan~
.-= LaShan ´s last blog ..The Great Escape…. More About My Time In Massachusetts =-.
YUCK!!! ewwwwwwwwww flu! feel better soon, keep your flu down there, we didnt’ get “shot”
.-= kyooty´s last blog ..Friday Fill-ins, Moonlight madness away! =-.
Hate that you are not feeling good..
But, I LOVE YOUR HONESTY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Your blog is great!!!
Hope you get to feeling better soon!
.-= noelle d´s last blog ..Give Me Five Monday – Meme =-.
I do feel sorry for you!! You go kick some Zombie ass and get back to us when you’re feeling better.
Totally love the bitchy posts though, they make me realize I’m not the only one who is maybe a little too close to the crazy ledge.
.-= Stephanie´s last blog ..And the winner is…. =-.
I sure hope you are feeling better soon – sending Hugs your way.
You know who’s got it bad? Vegan menopausal zombies who have the flu. And are dealing with post-mortem depression.
.-= Dr. B.´s last blog ..TOP TEN THINGS TO LOVE ABOUT GLENN BECK ( NOT REALLY THIS IS SATIRE, PEOPLE) =-.
Ah, you’ve come to the Zombie side. There’s no way back now. LOL We’re Resident Evil addicts over here.
.-= Storm´s last blog ..Review: Lollycadoodle =-.
I gotta tell you, I’m a little jealous – I wish I had as many good reasons as you do for being a complete bitch. As it is I’ve only got about a week a month covered. The rest I have to blame on the kids and hubby.
A couple good zombie games – Stubbs the Zombie and Dead Rising
Blowing people to bits is wonderful therapy.
.-= sheila sultani´s last blog ..The Mysterious World of Link-Building =-.
Hi Julie.
I’m feeling your pain. I got that nasty flu and didn’t even know it until after I thought I was over it. It took two weeks! I must say, it was a relief that it wasn’t a porcelain attachment kind of flu if you know what I mean.
Take care:)
.-= harriet´s last blog ..Do you Clean or replace filters on furnaces once a month? =-.
Awwwww! So sorry you’ve been sick! It really sucks extra over the Thanksgiving holiday for sure. Hope you feel better soon!! ((HUGZ!!))
.-= Stacy (the Random Cool Chick)´s last blog ..Random Tuesday Thoughts – Towering Dark Tree and 3D Nightmare =-.
{{HUGS}} Julie…I know you will feel better soon…you are a determined hard woman…by hard I mean you can take a lot and give it right back!
As far as the H1N1 aka swine flue here is a link you can self assess from the cdc if you wish…not somehtign really to mess with especially where you did have surgery not long ago…we need u here for a LONG time!
https://h1n1.cloudapp.net/default.aspx
xoxo
.-= Trish @IamSucceeding´s last blog ..Plans Do Change =-.
Julie Reply:
December 1st, 2009 at 3:33 pm
I had to go in, I guess they said mine’s severe. Thanks for that info though, you’re a great friend!
Sending a huge hug and hope you feel better soon! Go kick some &*#@ zombie killer!
.-= Stefanie´s last blog ..Keeping Kids Safe: Common (and Not So Common) Choking Hazards =-.
OMG, I do feel sorry for you! That’s way too much for one person. I can totally identify as I have the menopuse and anxiety disorder going on though no bi-polar and no Princely flu. Oh, but I’m out of work and christmas is coming…does that count.
Kill some zombies and eat some comfort food even though you’ll toss it later!
.-= Buggys´s last blog ..Take a Memo Monday – Dr. Ted’s Medicine Show =-.
I am so sorry to hear that you’re feeling so sick. I hope you feel better soon, but at least the zombies are entertaining you. If it is any consolation, I do love your site. Keep on writing, just maybe after you feel better…
.-= Blia´s last blog ..What Have I Done!?!? =-.
Your bitch-fests are funnier than pretty much most things I read…I’ve missed coming over, and I plan to remedy that this month, once I get over my November haze. :}
Get better soon, doll-face! xoxox
.-= Teresa´s last blog ..I got style – Kiss My Style, that is! =-.
Julie Reply:
December 1st, 2009 at 3:32 pm
Aww…thanks. You’re not missing much over here. Just the same ol’ crazy
Being sick always sucks – but being sick when you were looking forward to doing something special/seeing someone special/being somewhere special REALLLLY sucks. I’m sorry your turkey day anticipation was overtaken by a pig.
And I’m sorry that my Patriots’ defense let you down last night and led to my hanging on to victory in our head to head matchup. Well – I’m not really sorry about that – but I do feel bad that it continued your list of things to be pissed about.
.-= Bumbles´s last blog ..ON BLOGGING ~ December Daze… =-.
Julie Reply:
December 1st, 2009 at 3:27 pm
Ha. You made me both laugh and want to throw a vase in a fit of rage at the same time
Well, I could spew about how bad I feel for you…but then I would be no better than the stupid Dr. who makes you want to stick a stethoscope in their eye. I do LOVE you though, so if you need anything, let me know. I would mail myself to let you bitch and moan to…but my butt won’t fit in the mailbox. Silver lining….hmmmm….oh yes, when I am going through it you can laugh and point at me and secretly think “thank God that is over.”
.-= Frugal Vicki´s last blog ..Twinkies still taste the same! =-.
Julie I hope you feel better soon. You sound miserable. *HUGS*
.-= Cascia @ Healthy Moms´s last blog ..Twelve Days of Christmas Giveaway | $50 Gift Certificate to 1-800-BASKETS.COM =-.
Sorry to hear that you were sick over Thanksgiving, but I love the fact that you tell people about being bipolar. I too am bipolar along with OCD and ADD. My kids tell me that I take more pills than an old person! I tell people straight up that I’m bipolar also so that when I freak out on them out of nowhere they’ll understand, which they never do! I say bipolars unite and let’s have bipolar awareness week along with our own magnetic car ribbons. I think it gives us a right to bitch (we can’t help ourselves) or when we act a little crazy. By the way I too am menopausal so I know what you go through. Good luck to you in all of your endeavors.